Hong and Ben's Chinese Restaurant Christmas (a new story by Captain Dan)

Hong: I can't believe we have to work today.

Ben: I know, right?

Hong: How come Jewish people suddenly like eggrolls and Batman movies SO MUCH when it's exactly Christmas?

Ben: How come Santa Claus has a beard?  What's he hiding?

Hong: What should we do later?

Ben: Kill ourselves.

Hong: No I mean really.

Ben: We are gonna get high and watch Chevy Chase Christmas Vacation, same as every year.

Hong: Have you ever eaten Chinese food?

Ben: No.

Hong: Me neither.  I wonder what it's like?

Ben: It's like slightly worse pizza that's in chunks instead of slices.

Hong: Eggrolls would be such an easy way to prank somebody.  Anything could be in there.

Ben: I know, right?

Hong: If we put a whole roll of quarters in an eggroll shell by "accident" do you think that somebody would COMPLAIN?

Ben: Hmm, good q.

Hong: "Someone accidentally stuffed ten dollars worth of quarters in here!  I'm so mad!"

Ben: "and wait a minute! This Chinese burrito is just marijuana wrapped in seaweed!"

*bloop*

Hong: Oh wow, somebody just ordered something.

Ben: What do they want?

Hong: The usual stuff.  Mashed potatoes and Flintstone vitamins that you eat with chopsticks.

Ben: Do you know how to use chopsticks?

Hong: No.  I stuck them in my ear holes once and looked in the mirror, but did not take a picture.

Ben: ...

Hong: ...

Ben: Merry Christmas, Hong.

Hong: Merry Christmas, Ben.


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