BOO: a 5-year FLASHBACK blog!

(Originally posted October 31, 2008)

Well it's Halloween time which means lots of spooky fun for kids and certain unmarried adults.  Let the terror begin with this special Halloween blog.


Halloween is a holiday, but you still have to go to work.  They might let you wear a costume, though, depending on what your job is.  People like priests and the mailman just have to wear their regular stuff.

Americans eat more candy on Halloween than any other day of the year.  Most of the candy is "fun size."  Don't eat a king size Snickers on Halloween, you will spoil your appetite.

Dracula can only be killed by a wooden stake through the heart.  That's what they say but I'm pretty skeptical.  When was this put to the test?  If he walked away from flaming airplane wreckage I'd be convinced.  Also what if the earth explodes?  Does Dracula just float around in space forever?  He apparently does not suffocate.  So next time someone tells you that Dracula can ONLY be killed by a wooden stake through the heart you tell them "BULL SHIT."

If you go to a Halloween party at school they will probably have donuts and cider there.  It is the spookiest food and drink combination, as determined by the Food and Drug Administration.

a Jack-o-Lantern might seem like a waste of a pumpkin, but the truth is there ain't too much else you can do with pumpkins.  Pie for Thanksgiving, I guess.  Other than that the pumpkin is pretty useless, but people keep growing them because they are cool to look at.  It's like when people have fish as pets.  You just look at them for a month and then throw them away.

Frankenstein is not actually named "Frankenstein!"  That was just the name of the doctor that built him and brought him to life.  The monster did not have a name I don't think.  Good thing Dr. Frankenstein wasn't married or the monster would have been named "Austin" or "Tyler" or something like that.

Some places will set up a "haunted house" for Halloween, designed to give visitors a good-natured fright!  Most of these attempts fall flat, however, as they fail to incorporate the most common fears.  (Heights, needles, public speaking...)

More people are afraid of clowns than skeletons.  This is because skeletons are educational, whereas a clown is just loud and creepy.  If you are afraid of skeletons you are not allowed to be a scientist.

The worst Halloween costume?  Santa Claus.

Halloween is a good day for practical jokes but only certain kinds (jumping out of a closet with a knife, fake bloody stump hand that gets pulled off when you shake, etc.)  No replacing someone's ear drops with super glue on Halloween, save that for other times.


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