Who in hell prefers butterscotch?

It's okay to LIKE butterscotch in general but who ever picks that for their ice cream sundae?  With ice cream, and a lot of other desserts, you get two main choices.  Chocolate or strawberry.  I cannot fathom (yes FATHOM) somebody going up to a Mister Softee truck and requesting a butterscotch sundae.  Does that ACTUALLY EVER HAPPEN?

Ooh, these were neat.  Remember those little ice cream cups with the wooden spoon?

Right there, two options.  Chocolate or strawberry.  You pick one or the other.  There's no butterscotch option.  You know why?  It's because if you gave a little kid a little plastic tub of ice cream with butterscotch syrup infused he would START CRYING and THROW IT IN THE GARBAGE.

It's okay to experiment with other flavors once in awhile, I GUESS.  "Oh what the hey, I guess I'll order a PINEAPPLE sundae today!"  Go right ahead, fool.  Afterwards you're gonna be like "Why the hell didn't I just get something sane like chocolate?  Or maybe strawberry?  That's good too.  I somehow forgot that those were the best kinds."

Ice cream in general is weird like that.  31 Flavors?  THAT'S TOO MANY.  and a lot of them don't make any sense.  Mint chocolate chip makes sense.  LEMON does not.  Why is it even made?  If you ever ordered lemon ice cream in your life you were just trying too hard to be "different."  You are not different.  You are the same.  Eat a hot fudge sundae like a normal person and SHUT-UP.

Neapolitan ice cream is the most sensible dessert of all time.

(That's a difficult word to spell, btw.  Napoleon Bonaparte confused me so I had to spellcheck.)

Notice how right they got it.  Vanilla is there to keep chocolate and strawberry at peace.  You can take any of the three as its own thing, or just get all insane and scoop right across the middle.  They are all good flavors, so everything works out.  You can't actually get an ideal scoop such as depicted on the carton, however, and I will therefore now be suing the Breyers company for false advertising.

Anyway, notice what's NOT in there?  a big section of BUTTERSCOTCH.  Because that would be disgusting, and any idiot would know that.

Even him.

Click HERE.