Most girls wear make-up. It requires a lot of DECISIONS. If you don't wear enough, you are ugly. If you wear too much, you are a big whore. In other words, you are expected to put at least a LITTLE make-up on, but don't overdo it or you will be considered obnoxious, like happens with alcohol abuse and also prayer.
Men usually do not wear make-up unless they have certain jobs.
What if you have one of those jobs where you need to put make-up on and are "running late" for work? Do you just slap it on all shabbily or call in sick? If you are a clown or the President please get back at me.
Lipstick is very common, but only certain colors are accepted. Red, mostly. Some people wear black lipstick, but usually not at work. How come? Can you get fired for that? I've never had a job so I don't know what it's like. Imagine being called into a meeting because you have black or brown or orange lipstick on. "You are not a team player!" "Yes I am, I just don't think red is the best color!"
Does Chapstick count as make-up? I think no, but will listen to arguments. It's invisible, but usually comes in flavors.
Nail polish should be flavored. There are so many colors of it, there might as well be flavors too. If you bite your nails you should get to taste something. "Mmmm, WATERMELON!" Or if you consider biting nails to be abhorrent (ABHORRENT), how about Scratch and Sniff nails? Pizza and taco fingernails would be great, everyone would enjoy that.
Finally thanks to everyone who submitted a picture to our "Too Much Make-Up" photo contest. I strongly suspect that some of you cheated and submitted photos of people that are not actually you, but since I failed to think of that ahead of time and am also extremely wealthy, I will award the cash prizes anyway.
Click HERE.
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