Scrooge McDuck

Lots of problems with this guy. First of all, his name is "Scrooge." What the fuck? Have you ever had or been a baby? You don't name a kid that.

and then even the last name. "McDuck." There's Donald DUCK, Daisy DUCK, Huey Dewey and Louie DUCK, and then suddenly Scrooge MCduck. Where did he get that? He's a RELATIVE.

(Donald and Daisy same last name? Are they married? or is that why they CAN'T marry? Curious.)

So I figured Scrooge McDuck was only invented to be the main character in the Disney version of "A Christmas Carol." Nope. He was actually around for about half a century before that, appearing in comic books (there were Disney comic books?) until they finally decided to do the Christmas thing and have Scrooge play Scrooge. Someone at Disney must have been like "Who can play Scrooge? Oh wait we just happen to have a SCROOGE McDuck! Perfect."

By the way, the Disney version is officially titled "Mickey's Christmas Carol." WHAT? How about "Scrooge McDuck's Christmas Carol?" Total Richie/Fonzie situation right there.

So basically Scrooge McDuck was a JERK, then the Christmas Carol stuff happened, so he became a nice guy and went on to star in "Duck Tales." Problem there is that "A Christmas Carol" is set in the 1800s so hmmmm. Was the Disney version supposed to be in the 1980s? He wasn't watching TV in it. Nobody was wearing a headband or a Flashdance sweatshirt.

Scrooge McDuck liked to swim in his mountain of gold coins. Try doing that. I know that ducks are good swimmers but geez. Pretty fake.

Why does Donald Duck dress like that? Isn't he in the military? I have never seen a Naval officer wearing a gigantic red bow tie. Then again I was never in the Navy. Do they also tend to not wear pants? Goofy was always fully dressed. He's another one whose parents stuck him with quite the name.

Poor Goofy, he never had a chance.