Earth Day doesn't seem to be catching on too well as a holiday. You know why? No FOOD. All popular holidays are associated with food. Turkey or ham or figgy Christmas pudding WHATEVER.
a big problem is that the people that do ANYTHING for Earth Day do not like any kind of good food. They like brown rice and various types of SPROUTS. That makes it difficult to have a celebration.
Here is what Earth Day needs:
1) Some kind of comical Santa Claus figure
Some guy named "Doctor Earth" or something that passes out prunes and granola to childen. He could wear a big Olympic-type medal.
2) Fireworks
Admit it, you would get psyched up for Earth Day if there were fireworks at the end. Fireworks make everything better. Chinese people invented them, and they are very smart.
Meanwhile, Earth Day is WORTHLESS. (Yes that is what I SAID.) Get it out. Worst "holiday" ever. Arbor Day kicks the ass of Earth Day. You will never see a Charlie Brown Earth Day special, and they did one of those for everything.
In fact I will write one.
Charlie Brown: Hey Schroeder, another holiday is upon us. It's EARTH DAY.
Schroeder: It is? OH! I will compose a special song for Earth Day.
(Then he just plays Beethoven.)
Charlie Brown: Hey! That's not for Earth Day, that's Beethoven!
Schroeder: Yes because unlike Beethoven, Earth Day BLOWS a BIG ONE.
(Then he goes back to playing Beethoven.)
Charlie Brown: Good grief.
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