I heard about this new TV show called "Dancing With the Stars." What a great concept! You recruit a bunch of famous people and teach them how to dance on television. Who wouldn't love seeing Harrison Ford boogie down disco style, or Britney Spears being taught to do the limbo?
Instant ratings hit right there. Someone at ABC must be a GENIUS. Sponsors so pleased, potato chip sales going through the roof, etc.
BUT!
There was apparently this problem where nobody currently employed in the entertainment business wanted to dance on television. Therefore the "stars" in the current lineup include...
- Someone named "J.R. Martinez"
- One of the MALE Kardashians
- Courtney Cox's ex-husband
- a lady soccer player
- 1/3 of 90s group Wilson Phillips
- Kristin Cavallari of reality television FAME
- Sonny and Cher's transgendered offspring
...and the rest, whoever they are. The actual most famous of the whole bunch is Ricki Lake. You know, THAT Ricki Lake. She's BACK, man! NBA brawler Ron Artest was already eliminated, before he had a chance to start even one fight with the audience.
These people clearly want the spotlight back, and could probably all use a decent paycheck. So even though getting actual CELEBRITIES to dance on the show didn't work out, I think the concept can still be salvaged!
First of all, why does it have to be limited to a dancing competition? I say repackage the show as "Going Out With the Stars." The interactions between "star" and "instructor" would take place over three stages.
1) Dinner
2) Dancing
3) Who Knows?
Over dinner, it's the CELEBRITY who has the advantage. Who wouldn't feel intimidated out on a date with NANCY GRACE? With the WHOLE WORLD WATCHING?
Then it's time for the dancing, and the pendulum swings the other way. The instructor, while playfully encouraging, dances circles around his or her two-left-footed partner, and everyone at home has a good laugh. Basically the same as they do now. Don't want to give up on that aspect of the show entirely.
and THEN, off in a limo or moderately priced chauffeured vehicle they go! Whisked away into the night where romance, or perhaps REJECTION, awaits. You don't get to see any of the dirty parts because of the FCC and also human decency.
BUT!
The NEXT week each person gets to tell their version of what happened that night and the audience gets to decide whether or not they make a good couple and should go out again. Everyone votes, and the couple gets a final score that is kept in a secret gold envelope. At the end of the season, there is a very SPECIAL "Going Out With the Stars" where the final scores are REVEALED, and the couple with the highest score is named the Going Out With the Stars Champions!
By the way there will also be a lot of backstabbing and gossip throughout the season that fans of the show can read using Twitter.
ChynaPhillips @HopeSolo hey solo if ur man is so into u, y does he keep txting me?
DerekDanceStar @RickiLake u go girl! ...by which i mean go AWAY u r DUMPED!
Instant ratings hit right there. Someone at ABC must be a GENIUS. Sponsors so pleased, potato chip sales going through the roof, etc.
BUT!
There was apparently this problem where nobody currently employed in the entertainment business wanted to dance on television. Therefore the "stars" in the current lineup include...
- Someone named "J.R. Martinez"
- One of the MALE Kardashians
- Courtney Cox's ex-husband
- a lady soccer player
- 1/3 of 90s group Wilson Phillips
- Kristin Cavallari of reality television FAME
- Sonny and Cher's transgendered offspring
...and the rest, whoever they are. The actual most famous of the whole bunch is Ricki Lake. You know, THAT Ricki Lake. She's BACK, man! NBA brawler Ron Artest was already eliminated, before he had a chance to start even one fight with the audience.
These people clearly want the spotlight back, and could probably all use a decent paycheck. So even though getting actual CELEBRITIES to dance on the show didn't work out, I think the concept can still be salvaged!
First of all, why does it have to be limited to a dancing competition? I say repackage the show as "Going Out With the Stars." The interactions between "star" and "instructor" would take place over three stages.
1) Dinner
2) Dancing
3) Who Knows?
Over dinner, it's the CELEBRITY who has the advantage. Who wouldn't feel intimidated out on a date with NANCY GRACE? With the WHOLE WORLD WATCHING?
Then it's time for the dancing, and the pendulum swings the other way. The instructor, while playfully encouraging, dances circles around his or her two-left-footed partner, and everyone at home has a good laugh. Basically the same as they do now. Don't want to give up on that aspect of the show entirely.
and THEN, off in a limo or moderately priced chauffeured vehicle they go! Whisked away into the night where romance, or perhaps REJECTION, awaits. You don't get to see any of the dirty parts because of the FCC and also human decency.
BUT!
The NEXT week each person gets to tell their version of what happened that night and the audience gets to decide whether or not they make a good couple and should go out again. Everyone votes, and the couple gets a final score that is kept in a secret gold envelope. At the end of the season, there is a very SPECIAL "Going Out With the Stars" where the final scores are REVEALED, and the couple with the highest score is named the Going Out With the Stars Champions!
By the way there will also be a lot of backstabbing and gossip throughout the season that fans of the show can read using Twitter.
ChynaPhillips @HopeSolo hey solo if ur man is so into u, y does he keep txting me?
DerekDanceStar @RickiLake u go girl! ...by which i mean go AWAY u r DUMPED!
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