Another similarity to knights is that participants seem to enjoy wearing ridiculous costumes. Except while knights wear a suit of ARMOR, golfers wear plaid pants instead. Totally understandable as a suit of armor would be useless in golf (again, there's no hitting with the clubs) and would in fact hamper your performance. Then again if EVERYBODY wore them it could become it's own thing. Like when people box in the inflatable ring with giant gloves at the fair. (Do real boxers ever try that? I bet they dominate.) Also I guess there's no proof that the knights don't have plaid pants on underneath.
The best thing you can achieve in golf is a hole-in-one. It is also one of the rarest things you can pull off in all of sports, right behind a perfect game in baseball and water skiiers that hit a buoy but just keep on going.
One all-time famous golfer was Jack Nicklaus. His nickname was "The Golden Bear." Because when you think of an animal that would be good at golf, naturally you think of a bear. Anyway this has been problematic because whenever he makes a public appearance a bunch of kids show up expecting to see this guy:
They start crying, and he has to cheer them up with some funny stories. Fortunately another thing Jack Nicklaus is known for is telling funny stories. Unfortunately all of his funny stories are about golf.
Jack Nicklaus is also good at telling SPOOKY stories, such as while on camping trips.
(Those stories are also about golf.)
MINIATURE golf is fun, but don't ever play it if you're a midget. a news van will pull up with a camera and selfish intentions.
Well that's about all there is to be said about golf. If you want to know more you can watch the Golf Channel. Call your cable operator. or you can just go up to a bunch of guys playing golf at the park and start asking them questions. That's what I did.
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