Everyone is mad at Charlie Sheen

So the main thing going on lately is that Charlie Sheen has become a completely crazy nut that hates all people and he got kicked off television because of it.

It's not like before where he was SORT-of a crazy nut doing bad hooker stuff and threatening people, he is really off the deep end now. Also he is the most popular person in the history of Twitter including Obama. Nobody can wait to find out what this maniac will say next! "Dolphins should be killed and all babies should have to sleep right on the FLOOR." It will be something like that.

See the problem is that his television show "Two and a Half Men" is the only comedy show left that people still want to watch. I think it's because there's only men in it. There used to be a lot of shows with ladies in them, and the lady would be nagging her husband all the time ("You are dumb and should admit that men are never right about things!") and then they would play the laugh track and everyone at home would have a good time. That doesn't happen anymore. Nowadays ladies on TV are only well-liked if they are

a) Solving murders

b) Looking for aliens

c) Kissing vampires or other ladies

d) Wearing tight clothes on a spaceship

So now Charlie Sheen has all this clout being the only person that can keep a comedy show on the air. It has made him feel like a big shot and he thinks he can shoot his mouth off whenever he wants! I heard that FOX was gonna try to get Emilio Estevez to be in a show called "FOUR and a Half Men" but it didn't work out. I guess he was too busy.

What should we do about Charlie Sheen? Should he be arrested? Should he have to talk to OPRAH? Maybe we should make a new rule where he isn't allowed to go on planes.

Then again, maybe we should EMBRACE him. Just keep encouraging him, get him to do more and more insane stuff. Everyone hated the Oscars this year, maybe Charlie Sheen should host. He could crack everybody up with his comments. "...and the award for UGLIEST ETHNIC PERSON goes to...oops I read that wrong folks!" Murmurs of laughter fill the room, and Charlie Sheen is delighted. Everybody wins!

Are the other One and a Half Men mad at him? He sort of wrecked their gig. They should get on Twitter too and say bad stuff about Charlie Sheen to get even. "Charlie tries to seem cool but he actually collects Hot Wheels and I saw him eat a Taco Bell box meal once. He couldn't even finish it."

Charlie Sheen should also be the host of the Tonight Show, compete against Watson on "Jeopardy!", have a Christmas special, and be on the next season of "Dancing With the Stars" and scream epithets at his dance partner the whole time.

Also Michael Jordan should condemn him as a "Hanes" spokesman or at least do an ad where he runs him over with his car.