Girl Scout Cookies

Everybody loves Girl Scout Cookies, but how much do you KNOW about them?  You'll know everything after spending the next hour or so reading this all-encompassing Girl Scout Cookie blog!

Selling cookies to raise funds was one of the very first good ideas the Girl Scouts had, going back about 100 years.  They could not have a successful car wash fundraiser back then because only a few cars had ever been built and they were already still pretty clean.

Conversely, cookies are much easier to manufacture than cars, plus you can eat them.  It makes so much more SENSE.

Cookies used to be real basic.  a sugary treat that was easy to eat.  (Hey that RHYMED. #dibs #slogan)  Variety would come way later.

There are three MANDATORY (I am not making this up) varieties of Girl Scout Cookies that, not by coincidence, are also three of the most well-known AND popular.  There has yet to be a Girl Scout Cookie that is well-known for being UNpopular, but I suppose anything could happen under this Obama administration.

The mandatory cookies are:

- Thin Mints

- Peanut Butter Sandwich

- Shortbread

Those are the big three.  Caramel DeLites consistently rank towards the very top, but for some reason have not been deemed mandatory.  How come?  I will investigate this matter in the near future as soon as I figure out how.

Meanwhile, you may be wondering who actually MAKES Girl Scout Cookies.  If you think it is some sort of fantastical scenario like the Keebler Elves manufacturing cookies from the inside of a tree, you are surprisingly CORRECT.

Before you celebrate, though, it is important to recognize that I was not being literal right then.  The Keebler company DOES manufacture Girl Scout Cookies, but they do not employ actual elves.  They might hire the occasional dwarf or libertarian, but no elves of ANY kind exist in actual life currently.  Whereas Girl Scouts certainly DO, and therefore should not experience any guilt or hard feelings when taking credit for their wares (yes, WARES).

In fact I really like the idea of elves and girl scouts helping each other in general.  It would be a good idea for a movie, fictional television series, phone app, or at last resort even a "book."  I haven't had time to flesh out a whole plot yet, but at the very end I think Satan should get involved and also be killed.  (Rightfully).

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