Spell your name right: a 5-year FLASHBACK blog!

(Originally posted October 3, 2008)

Okay a big problem of the modern day is that about 98% of all people's first names are spelled wrong.

Years ago names were easy to spell.  "Mike" was "M-i-k-e."  "Ben was "B-e-n."  Even a potentially complicated name like "Jennifer" was a consistent "J-e-n-n-i-f-e-r."

Then along came "Sean," who was sometimes "Shawn."  Since then, the floodgates have opened and people now spell any name any old way they want.  They think that this will make their child special, but all it produces is a lifetime of corrections and the inability to purchase a novelty license plate for your bicycle with your name on it.

"Sean" and "Shawn" have now been joined by "Shaun" and "Shawne."  Like you really need that "e" on the end, it adds nothing.  "Well I want my kid to be different!"  Shut-up, all kids are the same.


"What is your name?"

"Mel."

"Oh that is m-e-l, I assume."

"No actually it's m-e-h-l-l-e."

Terrible.


It is time for the government to intervene.  We only need like 100 names, that is enough.  No more substituting an "i" for a "y."  "Cindi," "Marci," "Kimberli," all of you get out.  No "Kevans," "Genniphers," or "Phranques" allowed.

All Presidents in history have had properly-spelled names.  That is FACT.  Also the Beatles, the Brady Bunch, and the Apostles.  So let's end the nonsense.

(PS: Any pregnant ladies that need help picking a name for the kid can e-mail me and I will help for no pay.)


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